Ladies and gentlemen, sitting here,
Eating and drinking and warming a chair,
Feeling and thinking and drawing your breath,
Who’s sitting next to you? It may be Death.
As a high-stepping blondie with eyes of blue
In the subway, on beaches, Death looks at you;
And married or single or young or old,
You’ll become a sugar daddy and do as you’re told.
Death is a G-man. You may think yourself smart,
But he’ll send you to the hot-seat or plug you through the heart;
He may be a slow worker, but in the end
He’ll get you for the crime of being born, my friend.
Death as a doctor has first-class degrees;
The world is on his panel; he charges no fees;
He listens to your chest, says---"You’re breathing. That’s bad.
But don’t worry; we’ll soon see to that, my lad."
Death knocks at your door selling real estate,
The value of which will not depreciate;
It’s easy, it’s convenient, it’s old world. You’ll sign,
Whatever your income, on the dotted line.
Death as a teacher is simply grand;
The dumbest pupil can understand.
He has only one subject and that is the Tomb;
But no one ever yawns or asks to leave the room.
So whether you’re standing broke in the rain,
Or playing poker or drinking champagne,
Death’s looking for you, he’s already on the way,
So look out for him tomorrow or perhaps today.
sugar daddy - (slang) a rich usually middle-aged or old man who bestows expensive gifts on a young person in return for companionship or sexual favours
- (US, slang) an FBI agent
- (Irish) a political detective